Logo

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

Last Updated: 18.06.2025 01:06

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”

By taking turns talking.

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

Artists get better with age, e.g., painting. Yet when it comes to pop music, the famous work tends to be written when musicians are in their twenties. So, why aren't Bob Dylan or the Stones banging out amazing tunes now?

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.

By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

What's the point of gender reassignment surgery which doesn't change a person's chromosomes?

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.